This is a wonderful day. I have never seen one like it before
Recently, a friend asked me an initially daunting question. She said, “how have your values changed since you were young, and what do you value now?” Having a rather philosophical personality to begin with, and nearing the grandmotherly age of eighty years, I was stopped in my tracks by those ethereal concepts. I truly had no idea how to answer, so, I began thinking.
My first thoughts were of my Lord and the blessings I have received from Him. Without Jesus, my life’s journey would have been lonely and pointless. He has given me all of what I have and who I am. His love sustains me, daily. I have known that for a long time.
As I then thought of my secular life, I wondered about specific worldly values. What was important to me, and had that focus changed from when I was young girl? What was it in life that kept me going amid daily challenges?
My husband, children, grandchildren, extended family, students, and close friends, always highly valued, had changed over the years. Although continually a part of me, they were present at different times and for different reasons. They were integral to my history. So, what was an underlying value that connected me during that time? I thoughtfully considered the span of my life, and then I knew; Time was that delicate thread.
It was time that wove everything together. During each segment of my life, school, college, marriage, parenthood, teaching, I was forever juggling and searching for enough time to do what I had to do. My frustrations were causally related to the number of hours in the day. Time became my enemy----my never having enough time often disappointed others, kept significant tasks unfinished, and at times, left me unfulfilled. I worked hard to effectively master my life, and I think I did an adequate, even credible job of managing. But there was always that time thing to face . . . the never-ending hurdle.
In my golden years now, I am allowed more time; what was once an obstacle is now and limited resource. The hours in the day are not consumed by as much busyness as before, and I enjoy making the time my own. God has given me infinite options, and I am inspired. Although I cannot move as quickly, see as clearly, or think as cleverly as I once did, I still want to play with my grandchildren, connect with others, record memories for my family, and laugh uproariously at the miscues my age causes, a source of continual amusement.
I am grateful for this new time. And so, my focus, my worldly values today are different. And now, Time is my friend.
There is time for work and a time for love. That leaves no other time
2/1/2021 04:51:53 pm
Retirement was so hard for me to get used to because for the first time in my life, I had too much time. If I had grandchildren, the time would easily have been filled. I structured my lessons in school so well but couldn’t structure my own free days at all. Now, after six years, I’m in a groove. I walk two miles every day with a friend, often with my dogs. The lockdown has increased my number of houseplants and I piddle with them a lot. But I miss and crave meaning and connection. So, on Friday I am going to Annapolis to speak in favor of a hate symbols ban (swastika, Confederate flag, noose, etc.) for all of Maryland’s schools. Something to look forward to, and something that is important. I’m working on what to say in my allotted three minutes. Definitely not nervous to speak as teaching prepared me for just about anything!
Leave a Reply.